Posted by: Diane | April 22, 2013

Accumulated Disappointment – Renewed Hope

I knew I would feel “down” yesterday. I could feel it coming and I warned my husband.

It wasn’t one thing; it was a lot of things. A friend of mine labelled it “accumulated disappointment.”  Great term – speaks volumes to me.

Hobbling around with broken toes has slowed me down enough to come face to face with my feelings…and I do believe it’s OK not to be OK.  I can totally relate to this little girl’s feelings as she headed to the beach with her big plans.

disappointment

Sometimes, life feels heavy, doesn’t it?

I’ve been juggling a lot of balls lately and they’ve all come tumbling down – manuscript rejection, Amazing Race rejection, disappointment at the Toastmasters competition and the list goes on.  It isn’t devastating but for a time, it feels a bit overwhelming.

Yesterday, I lost perspective. My husband sat close to me, asked me some good questions and let me cry for a few minutes.  He gave me space, time and permission to feel what I needed to feel so that I could start my journey to the other side of disappointment…

…because there is another side.

My eight year old grandson is with us today and when he crawled onto my lap, read my blog-in-the-making and saw the picture of this little girl at the beach, he said, “Nana, are you blogging about disappointment?  Everybody feels it sometime. I feel it too – especially when I get grounded…but it doesn’t last forever. 

Phoenie’s got it right. Disappointment doesn’t need to last forever. My life has taught me  not to ask “Why, Lord?” because I do believe that “everything belongs.”  I’ve learned to acknowledge my feelings and bring them to God because I am completely confident that He listens and delights when I empty my heart to Him.

Eventually, I can ask, “What’s next, Lord?”….and I move on.

…but it takes a bit of time, a few tears and a renewed perspective.

Thanks, Chris…for loving me well and letting me cry.

Thanks, Phoenie…for cuddling up close and explaining life to me.

Thanks, God…for Your goodness and Your anchoring hope.

Disappointment to a noble soul is what cold water is to burning metal; it strengthens, tempers, intensifies but never destroys it.  Eliza Tabor


Responses

  1. Hey Diane – I know it’s disappointing but these experiences are what make you who you are…

    You see you are a great writer, storyteller , woman of faith, wife, mother and mentor not in spite of your disappointments but because of them.

    Everything that happens in our lives is part of our story – it’s what makes you be able to get to the District Level Speaking Contest (a huge accomplishment in itself) or even to put your name into the Amazing Race competition (a huge step of courage) or to write a book (that’s a big deal right there!) These are the times that define who you are!

    Grieve for a moment for whatever you feel you lost… but at the end of the day celebrate what you have gained… not many people know how to do this but the one who does is ultimately the champion -with or without a medal, trophy or publication to prove it. They are the one who can look others in the eye and say… I’ve been where you are and there is hope.

    My dear friend, you have talent of great measure; you have unending hope, and most of all you have people who love you and to them you are always a WINNER!

    When life looks the darkest that’s when you notice the light.

    • Thank you, Kathy…for such kind, motivating words. I know you’ve
      “been there” and it’s all about perspective, isn’t it? Your loving, encouraging words really mean a lot to me.

  2. I like your comment, Kathy.

  3. DITTO to every word that Kathy said! I adore the fact that God NEVER wastes our “pain and disappointments” He uses us, and our circumstances to help another warrior….along this path called “life” xoxo

  4. Don’t know how this fits, if it even does (?) but it resonated with me today.

    “Everybody Is A Genius. But If You Judge A Fish By Its Ability To Climb A Tree, It Will Spend Its Whole Life Thinking It’s Stupid.”
    -Albert Einstein

    Glad you understand that you are not the rejections but a whole boatload of other things – wife, mom, grandma, friend, etc.

    OK – still don’t know how it fits, but your blog reminded me of it, so I guess it fits for me!

  5. So sorry Diane. My heart goes out to you. I would be a whole lot worse in your shoes, but then I wouldn’t even have tried. Praying for you, knowing you have a heart that seeks after God, and He takes great pleasure in showering you with His love, through Chris and Phoenie.
    Love
    Barb

  6. Kathy- you rock girlfriend. Wow what an awesome response. Um, yeah, Diane- what she said, me too!!

    Diane- I do empathize with you regarding the emotional roller-coaster we put ourselves on when we stick our necks out and do something that could potentially provide great happiness and praise or great disappointment and rejection. I am sooooo glad you have done all that you have done. You LIVE life. You inspire. You share your awesome moments and your tearful moments. That’s what we LOVE about you. Your authenticity. It ROCKS!!!

    Seriousy, I could go on & on with how many ways you have “pulled me up” again and again. 🙂

  7. Loved the graphic! You used the word disappointment as the theme for this, but in two of your personal examples use the word rejection. Doors don’t usually close quietly, they tend to thunderously slam shut. I think that figuratively speaking, like the girl in the picture, we just have to look for a different beach. It’s out there somewhere.

    • Thanks, Paul. Wise words. I’ll keep looking for a different beach. Diane


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